Chapter II

Chapter II: On Berkeley Square (or whatever)
So our boy Edward wakes up after some pretty neat dreams and wants only one simple thing - to eat. Yet it's not as easy as Edward thought it would be, because int he dining room two Heterosexual Bachelors: his uncle and Sir Thomas Lawrence are discussing how attracted they are to women. Edward, however, is more attracted to food so he finally enters the room after talking to birds for a while. He eats freaking nothing because I have no talent&can't describe food and was too lazy to google some healthy vegan gluten-free regency breakfast recipes. Thanks to me, Edward ends up listening about heterosexuality and answering stupid questions about the Dorks. He says he would fuck all of them also asks some stupid questions himself and gets kicked out of the dining room and left home alone. He reads William Pitt's favourite fanfic and then remembers he ate nothing. Unfortunately, I still haven't googled any recipes, so he meets Dodie Clark a British singer Canning who is very ill and also too cool to acknowledge that. He invites Edward to eat at his place, so they set off, falling in love on the way.

At number 50 they meet Dodie's family, every member of which is really tired of being a member of it (thanks, Geo). When Edward is finally ready to eat, George Canning does some shit and everyone ends up drinking tea instead. Joan sends everyone to hell, takes her youngest son and leaves (probably to eat), while her husband tells you some dank regency memes, which no one understood even then because they were weird and also Greek/Latin/gay. And no one understood Canning. The kids go away to play *insert regency game* and Edward and Canning are left alone for the purpose of Bonding™. But Canning's a dick, so he makes it Really Hard.

After trying to convince Canning he's smart, Edward shows he's dumb and walks around the square with Dodie, where he finally eats something, because at last, I spent two hours googling food. Both gays boys recall what a great mother William Pitt was. Edward tells Dodie he wants to play Cluedo and solve some mysteries, so they decide to invent detective stories before Conan Doyle and finally part.

At home, Edward falls ill (probably from eating weird street food) and has another nice nightmare involving an easter egg aka the Wilberforce Oak and some Freud stuff. Thus the chapter about finding food ends.